I play a very dangerous game
it’s not my fault people have the gall to make attractive OCs
ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS
YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING
NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED
IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGES
thanks for the tip karkat
not sure why people don’t automatically say “shapeshifting” when asked what they want their superpower to be. you could become anyone you want. even fictional characters. anyone. cosplay would always be spot-on. dysphoria wouldn’t exist. perfection
rob a bank and disguise yourself as a stray pen lying on a shelf when the cops come
A pen with a shit ton of money lying next to it.
Map of the World by Natural Skin Color
i’m really dumbfounded that i never realized skin colour is literally just caused by being closer to or farther from the equator and the resulting sun exposure and skin darkening
actually, its an adaptation. natural selection. people with darker skin are selected for in areas near the equator, where the melanin that causes the darker color protects them from radiation and protects them from skin cancer and other health defects, and because they are healthier they can pass on that trait more. people near the poles have lighter skin because it allows them absorb more of the limited sunlight to convert to vitamin d.
THIS IS THE THING SOME PEOPLE HATE OTHER PEOPLE OVER.
Evolution of melanin levels based on geographical location.
IT HAPPENED AGAIN.. this time i wasnt even mad lmao im used to it.. #Wow #SheThinkImStealingPart2
I love this movement
Look at this post racial society we live in today
Let’s not forget racism and stereotyping are very real problems in 2014.
can we all just take a minute to imagine steve rogers’ face the first time he heard someone say “motherfucker” casually
This gets me every time
Thor’s pop-tart and Steve’s face omg
Anna: I see you have a white streak just like mine. I dreamed I was kissed by a troll.
Me: *mumbles* Well, I’m trying to get kissed by a princess, I’m still looking for the one.
Anna: (because I mumbled) So you want a kiss from a Prince or a Princess?
Me: *still mumbling* Princess.
Anna: I can help with that! Come here.
And there you have one of the most important moments in my life.
I don’t usually saturate people with pictures of my ugly face, but every person in this world needs to know what that amazing girl did for me.
Oh my goooood that is so cute